thoughts of today.

Okay, what the hell.

When I'm silent, but not telling her what's wrong with me, she gets mad.  I'm NOT TALKING FOR A REASON.

Then when I tell her WHY I'm mad she gets friggin mad to the point to block me.  What the hell.

Then when I'm moving on, SHE FRIGGIN TELLS ME TO BE HER BEST FRIEND then maybe something will happen.  WHAT THE FUCK.

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Anyways, I'll teach her what true love is about. BUAHAHAHAHA. I know her.  And if I knew her well enough, I'd know, or feel to know what she really wants.   She's disappointed in me. We're friends forever.  I won't let this contradiction be a contradiction.FOR HER SAKE.

Or it's probably my sake.  I don't know, whatever.  I just know that I can stand this test of time.

There was something else... oh yeah, and I'm the man in this thing so I have to fix anything.  The stupid fucking man in this shit =_=

"I realized... the moments I miss the most were never even real."- Postsecret post

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And then I realized, I can't construct the email I want to, because I lost faith in even myself.  How can I write an honest email, and how can I write honestly, if I'm not ALL good.  How come I can't feel it?

I hate getting into arguments.  They're stupid. Just leave everything as it is.  Let it be. Why did she have to get so angry?  Why couldn't she let it be?

I don't believe in friendship, and I never will. Friendship is stupid.