just questions. and some answers.

She blocked me.  I think it's only because I'm not showing my effort as much as I thought I was.

Do I list all her cons?  Is she worth it?

She killed a few online relationships of mine.  She didn't keep her promise.  But she's hurt.

Do I like her because I pity her?  No, I don't pity her, I am amazed at her performance with others, though in my experience with her, she has a limit.

I do have a lot of time on my hands.  How about trying it?  Trying to write this ultimate letter?  I have a feeling that it'll bring her back to my future life.

But what if she does come back?  That hurt will come back.  The hurt that made me drop Pharmachology last year.  Made me achieve a C in Physiology.  The hurt that got me a D in Microbiology. The hurt that made me lose time with friends, that made me drift apart from my friends.

I got what I needed from her, right?  Should I just move on?

But what if we become lovers. I don't know what she'll be like, but I have a hunch to what she is like, and the hunch is hunching ferociously.

It will be worth it... this is a scar in my life.  I'll regret not doing it, I may fall down even more, sinking down to the core.

Show her the effort.  Get her back.  See what happens.

Her blocking me is actually my best chance to show how much I care.  But now the feeling is waning, and I don't think it's worth it.  It's not worth it.