Friday, February 19, 2010

is it?

I hope it's going to be worth it.  I hope she won't disappoint me.  I hope things go well for us.  I hope she'll be okay.  All these restful and restless nights...

all this waiting, thinking, lonely times.

These thoughts to myself, thoughts for myself.

What do I do?  I want to keep loving her.  She WILL be the girl that I want to live with forever.  But it can still go wrong... she's someone else's.

And that's why I should let go.

But that would be stupid, it's like turning down kajillion dollars, plus a lifetime supply of love. And that high feeling, but minus the damagy brain part. Lol, I want to tell her this, she might laugh.  Or not, she'll take it seriously.

Bleh, not letting go... not letting go!

Those times? My committed heart searched for a solution.  I was committed.  I didn't escape.

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