I can't focus on life anymore.

Certainly I was okay before I met her.  I handled things well, hence, why I am still alive today.  If I was not okay, I would be dead. Or did I get that wrong?

Being not okay should not mean that you are dead.

Anways.

But what did I actually do before I met her?

Oh, that's right.  I was waiting for someone like her to come into my life.