it is unfortunate.

If we don't plan on where we're going, we'll end up where we didn't plan on going.

Everyone's working hard on their goals.  To make money, meet that special someone, gain some sort of status to show off to their friends.  To support themselves.

Except me.  I feel that my goal is to die. I only see death.  No middle point, just death.   Closest to death is torture.  Passing a test is close to success.  It's like the success in progress.  Torturing oneself, is hurt, death is extreme hurt, thus it is the success after achieving consecutive 100%s on torture.

I will fail all my tests.  I will destroy all my relationships.  I'll build a wall over my island.  I'll isolate myself.  I'll make bad first impressions.  I'll eliminate emotions except the feeling of melancholy.

It is unfortunate that I unconsciously care about my own well-being.

I tested our knives.  The sharpest one seems to be the one with "R O G E R" engraved on the blade.