Laughter is not the answer

You know what I never do?

Convince myself that I have friends.

Conversations today left a bitter taste in my mouth.

The most recent one was with this Jehovah's witness.  I had a good experience conversing with one last time, so I thought this one would go well.  But it didn't.  The old man was like a possessed brick.  I could not sense any sentiment in his eyes.  A suffocating feeling.  I would not like to experience that again, and I am happy to say that I recluse myself from all people, especially people like that.

Did Franz Kafka really say "A first sign of the beginning of understanding is the wish to die."?  (Well of course he did not say it in English, it was translated from German.)

AND ANOTHER THING

Regarding 1Q84.

Not as engaging as his others' because it is in 3rd POV.

AND... I think he should have just ended it on volume 2.  It should have not ended with Tengo and Aomame meeting each other... should have made them search for each other for all eternity!  Just like how I am waiting for her. 

Of course she could not understand my actions.  SHE'S LEFT HANDED.  I am so dumb. And one of the reasons why I like her is because she is left handed.

YEAY I HAD A DREAM ABOUT HER.

It wasn't a good dream though, but whatever.

I always think that when I have a dream about someone, that same person has a dream about me too.

So I am hoping she had a dream about me...

The things that I was ever good at didn't matter to me.

So it didn't matter at all.